Y’all, This week has been a challenge. I mean, that sounds weird to say that because I can’t recall a time in the last 15 years that wasn’t a challenging week, but this week my OCD flared up REALLY bad on Wednesday. When you deal with something like OCD everyday you sometimes forget the intensity of it when it’s at its peak.
Guys, it was so bad I called like 5 random therapists/ psychologists I found on google that are in my area trying to find someone to see me that day. Luckily I found a lady who called me back and could see me right away. She was nice and had a pretty decent knowledge of OCD (why is that usually hard to find??).
Anyway, she said something that was SO helpful to me and I have to share it with you all. She said “OCD is misplaced anxiety.” She said she feels like most of my OCD is based on a real fear that I face daily and that I’m subconsciously trying to hurt myself to avoid the real pain that I have to carry. I REALLY think she is on to something! I have been trying to examine my OCD and the times it flares up and I definitely see a pattern. In a OCD world where nothing makes sense and everything is confusing, this little piece of hope in understanding my brain better was such a welcome gift!!
The last few days when I feel the OCD I say to myself “this is just misplaced anxiety” and I relax my tensed muscles and exhale. I recognize and acknowledge the anxiety that I carry (even if I don’t feel like it is a particularly high anxiety time at that moment I’ve learned that it can still effect me.) Then I try to continue whatever I’m doing as normally as I can. So far it has been a wonderful tool to add to my toolbox of things to fight my OCD!
I so hope this helps you too!!